a lot on my plate
A lot's been going on in my life as of late, but hopefully things will calm down soon. Things are becoming a little hectic at school because the first quarter is ending, and we have unit tests to prepare for. Yesterday I didn't update my site at all because I had a panic attack that caused me to lose all feeling in my left hand temporarily, and I took the rest of the day to relax my brain and recover from the experience. Today we made an appointment for me to go for a wellness visit next week, which I'm dreading because I hate having to go into doctor's offices. Most of the people in the office that I go to are very rude to me, so it takes a while for me to mentally prepare for the appointment. But luckily my doctor is very nice and understanding, and always listens to my concerns and does her best to look out for me. I'm also currently trying to get arrangements for me and my friends to go out somewhere to eat for my birthday on December 7th. We're currently trying to find places where we're all willing to eat, that aren't very expensive, and allow larger groups. So far, Panera bread is looking like the best option. I'm not really sure what I want as presents though, so I just told my friends they can just go to a thrift store and pick out any shirts that they think I might like. I'm not hard to please.
Hopefully all this goes by smoothly and I don't have any more mental health incidents. That would be a disaster if I ended up having to miss school at the end of the quarter for something like that, because last time I checked, "mental health days" are not a legal absense, although I feel like it should be considering that sometimes on particularly bad days I lose control of my body because of the lack of oxygen to my brain. :/ Oh well, nothing I can do about it, I guess. I took medications for years but in the end they were making me feel worse so after switching them out a few times with no luck I stopped taking them, which has proved to have its ups and downs. On the positive side I feel much better physically now that I'm not taking medication, but the downside is that mentally I'm a lot more fragile without my medications, so it's easier for me to be set off by little things.
I'm still hoping that I'm able to find more time to balance my school, my website, and my other hobbies that I've been neglecting. But I'll get to them eventually.